Last week Melinda Pongrey at LD Live! asked me about my communication skills. "Could you always tell people what you needed?" I told her, "No." Like most students who fall outside the "norms" created by school, I spent a lot of time mute, especially when it came to asking for things which might help me.
Then, over the weekend I watched a film that a friend lent me, Taare Zameen Par. And I cried because, well, in part because of the familiarity.
The child in the film hides and draws. I used to do that. I had this chalkboard in my tiny bedroom and I would disappear into worlds that I drew for myself there. Safe worlds. World where I could be whatever I wanted to be.
Those worlds, those drawings on the chalkboard, like the art of the child in this film from India, were my voice. Even if that voice only reached as far as myself.
But then, as adult after adult tells you that your way of expressing yourself does not matter, and that, in the ways that matter you are incapable of expressing yourself, eventually you might even give up that voice you have. Every answer you give is deemed wrong, or even laughed at. Every thought you have is outside of what people expect - and they tell you that. Everything you write comes back covered in "corrections." When you do things that seem right to you - from the music you hum or drum with your fingers to the pictures you draw in the margins of papers, to the daydreams you dwell in which let your imagination run - the humiliation and denigration just get worse.
So you find yourself sitting in silence. In the back corners of classrooms. In "resource rooms." In school corridors and offices. In car parks and city parks. Hidden in your own room. Wherever. It does not matter. You have learned that you are worthless, and your communication is worthless. Maybe you'll still yell from time to time, or fight, because that's all that's left and you're human after all, but silence will have descended.
Even as a "typical" student who had a lot of fun in high school, I realized the importance of having an opportunity to develop my special "voice." I never would have mustered the discipline for all the math and science classes I took if I hadn't had band to look forward to every day. It took up some of my study time, but it also energized me and made be a better student overall.
I think about that when I hear about school rules that kick kids out of their extra-curricular activities if their math grades aren't high enough. (And then there's the budget cuts that take music, art and theater away from everyone, but that's for a separate rant.)
You said: "A huge part of the solution is instructional tolerance - the willingness of teachers to accept real differences in learning and communication styles within a single classroom - the willingness of teachers to give up control over what students are doing every minute (an essential concept behind the effective use of personal Information and Communication Technologies - which cannot be used or personalized if too tightly controlled)."
The problem with this statement is that there is a middle ground. We have to give instructors the benefit of the doubt as much as we do the student. Why? I know many instructors who value communication and individual voices as much as you do. But, in my experience (and I'm pretty tolerant), many students using personal communications devices often communicate with folks outside the classroom about topics that have nothing to do with why we're ALL in class in the first place.
We have to balance instructional tolerance and having voices with some degree of focus. Instructors have to offer a program and draws one's focus, and students have to sacrifice and pay attention.
I hope I'm not being too rigid here. I do appreciate the larger points of your post.
Too rigid? Nah. Especially not in your university environment. There - I actually think everywhere - part of enabling voice includes learning not to step on the rights of others. Plus, universities are - more or less - voluntary.
Most of this post is about K-12, of course, but I'll add that I think it is essential to encourage student voice at every level. Part of that is instructional tolerance and part of that is lowering the risk of speaking out and speaking differently.
5 comments:
"...the most important thing you can do for students is to enable their voices, and to value their voices."
This sums up what ought to be the prime imperative of all "educators", including teachers, parents, and others.
This fundamental principle is really something I believe we need to practice in all of our relationships.
Even as a "typical" student who had a lot of fun in high school, I realized the importance of having an opportunity to develop my special "voice." I never would have mustered the discipline for all the math and science classes I took if I hadn't had band to look forward to every day. It took up some of my study time, but it also energized me and made be a better student overall.
I think about that when I hear about school rules that kick kids out of their extra-curricular activities if their math grades aren't high enough. (And then there's the budget cuts that take music, art and theater away from everyone, but that's for a separate rant.)
Dear Ira,
You said: "A huge part of the solution is instructional tolerance - the willingness of teachers to accept real differences in learning and communication styles within a single classroom - the willingness of teachers to give up control over what students are doing every minute (an essential concept behind the effective use of personal Information and Communication Technologies - which cannot be used or personalized if too tightly controlled)."
The problem with this statement is that there is a middle ground. We have to give instructors the benefit of the doubt as much as we do the student. Why? I know many instructors who value communication and individual voices as much as you do. But, in my experience (and I'm pretty tolerant), many students using personal communications devices often communicate with folks outside the classroom about topics that have nothing to do with why we're ALL in class in the first place.
We have to balance instructional tolerance and having voices with some degree of focus. Instructors have to offer a program and draws one's focus, and students have to sacrifice and pay attention.
I hope I'm not being too rigid here. I do appreciate the larger points of your post.
- TL
Too rigid? Nah. Especially not in your university environment. There - I actually think everywhere - part of enabling voice includes learning not to step on the rights of others. Plus, universities are - more or less - voluntary.
Most of this post is about K-12, of course, but I'll add that I think it is essential to encourage student voice at every level. Part of that is instructional tolerance and part of that is lowering the risk of speaking out and speaking differently.
- Ira Socol
and Paul: Absolutely. Giving Voice. It would surely make the world a better place because...
as Penny points out - this is not a disability issue, it is human issue.
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